Seattle’s finest :)
Post-Recovery, Pre-Rebound
So, it’s been almost a week since a whirlwind couple of days that led to what essentially amounted to a double breakup. I would admit, there were a lot of tears and a lot of drinking. After all that though, it’s getting better. I know that things were not meant to be.
Most obviously, I’m off the market for a some time yet. Just not ready just yet. That day will come yet.
Breakup
Yes, that dreaded word. Something no one ever wants to go through, but somehow always manages to experience. I’m going through one right now.
It was only a couple of days ago. Simply put, we both had issues that we have to deal with, and the timing of our relationship was not perfect. We vowed to remain best of friends.
Still, that doesn’t make it hurt any less. I feel that in time, things could go somewhere. Time was not on our side.
As you can imagine, I’m feeling pretty lousy right now, at the same time, I don’t want to sound like Nancy Kerrigan (of the Why? Why? Why? fame). There are far worse things to go through, after all. Consolation? Hardly, but it is a reminder that this too, shall pass.
Wish me luck :-)
Best of Times, Worst of Times
I’m writing this while having a cup of tea at my local coffee shop. They open until very late at night, which is a blessing for me! YAY!
As the title suggests, it’s some strange times I live in. On the one hand, I am getting to know some great people, and doing some great things at work. On the other hand, dark clouds are hanging over the horizon already.
First, the good stuff. With a number of my colleagues off this week, I was able to do a lot more at my workplace, and be a leader of sorts. It was challenging, but I crave that challenge. Give me that problem! lol
Now, the not-so-good part.
Recently, I found out that a good friend/colleague *might* be leaving his job, and move to another part of the state. I may have mentioned him before. He’s the friend who got me to come out of the closet, and have been there to support me all the way.
He told me he will find out sometime next week whether he will leave his job. On the one hand, I am happy for him. He’s a very nice guy, and he deserves to go wherever he wants to go. On the other hand, however, I feel like I am about to lose a great pillar of support, and to be very frank, I haven’t a lot of those to start with.
He is one of the few people I trust. I have not come out to a lot of people (not even my parents), and I only decided to come out to my colleagues because I (mistakenly) thought one of my colleagues was about to out me. Every time I faced a great challenge, or just needed someone to vent to, he was there. In a way, he’s my big brother. My life coach.
I’ve actually cried over this for a few days. I’ll be displeased if he fails to get the job, because I know that’s what he wants, but I’ll be really sad if he leaves.
Such is life…
Two Months After Coming Out
I’m writing this, after spending part of Saturday in Bozeman for MT Pride. Still remembered when I told a friend of mine, TJ, that I will probably never go to a pride event. I told him that after I came out to him. Famous last words, I guess…
As the title says, this is a status update of how life has been since I came out. There is a lot of progress, but at the same time, there’s a lot that remains to be figured out.
I came out to my friend in late April, and what started off as fears and uncertainties has been replaced with, in a way, empowerment and liberation. There are still some uncertainties, however.
At first, I was only going to come out to my friend, and no one else. I was really afraid of backlash at work, and perhaps getting fired, even though my boss is a tolerant person.
Things changed after I went to this speech. The person told the audience that no one should be paralyzed by fear. That was when I decided that it’s not good to spend the rest of my life hiding this. Gradually, I told most of my coworkers and close friends.
There are still a few people I have not told, either because they will not react favorably to the news, or because they simply won’t care at all.
As for dating, I was dating this guy, but things didn’t work out. No worries however. After all this, I now believe things have a tendency to fall into place eventually. I’m very sure I will find someone.
